Perfection not needed - but having a go is

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway" - John Wayne

Do you know HOW uncomfortable you feel when you want to take those first tentative steps toward Change?  The beginnings of a hard knot in the pit of your stomach saying to you to
"stay comfortable"
"why fix it if it ain't broke?".  Something's broke alright.  Only I missed the internal memo alerting me to that.

I'm in the process of starting my own business in energy healing.  I'm also working with a number of very driven, like-minded individuals on another business project.  Out of this has fallen (nothing surprises me much these days) another solo project - another business - that I intend on nurturing towards fruition.

But you know what?  I am petrified!

Of not getting it right
Of being judged
Of failure

A few weeks after Mum passed I had an old school friend private message me.  I had been watching NZ renowned psychic, Sue Nicholson's live feed on Facie and I had asked for a card.  Truth be told, I didn't really expect a response.  From Ms Nicholson at least.  And I didn't get one.  My friend contacted me a few days after, asking if I got a card and if not, she was happy to draw some cards for me.  I had done a 3-card draw for myself a few days earlier I was naturally curious as to what might come up for me.
The cards that were drawn I was fascinated by as they all pointed to one main topic in my mind.  Money.
"Face your Financial Fears" spoke to my immediate past:

But if I delve a little further......
When we were children, our wee family consisting of myself, my two brothers and our Mum, subsisted on a solo mums benefit.  Money was tight.  Luxury items were non-existent let alone branded clothing, shoes or accessories.  I had so many hand-me-downs (and I'm the ONLY girl!) and we frequently ran out of the basic necessities in our household.  We knew never to ask for high-value items as we knew the answer we'd get and it usually was;

"We can't afford it"

Finances were never spoken of in our house.  The common approach towards money and how it is generated and transacted was never a topic of discussion. Well, not between adults and the children in the household anyway. 
This points to my own limiting beliefs that I had subconsciously adopted and those beliefs, I suspect, my parents had also adopted as children also and who knows, their parents may well have been the same too!! 
Eventually,  I learned never to ask for items that I thought would stretch the budget, so I was pleased as punch when I got my first part-time job working in a fish and chip shop taking orders and making burgers.  Not surprisingly, my meager wage would prop up the house's allowance and I'd buy milk, bread, the daily paper and sometimes I'd give Mum some money, never begrudging her a treat for herself.  It never occurred to me to not give any as it made our family better off....didn't it?
While I believe in my ability to make money, being able to hold onto for any length of time and reinvest in is another thing.  By my own stark admission, I had been financially illiterate and it's time to CHANGE that right now. 

"Windfall of Abundance" spoke to my present.  Abundance, I've slowly realised, can be observed and felt in more ways that just the arrival of money in the bank. 
Abundance also speaks to the sorts of relationships you nurture and maintain with your friends and loved ones, the longer-term networks (and friendships) you may acquire through starting a business (and this is on the cards for me) or taking part in new ventures with people who in the same vein inspire you to be a better version of yourself all the time.  Those are the positive experiences we come across in this journey called life if only to desire more of the same.  The prospect of this is very exciting as I know and believe this is happening already on so many levels. 

"It is Safe for you to Receive" speaks to my future.  YES! is all I can say to this as I've been the blockage to my own abundance for so long I wondered if I was worthy of any real and tangible goodness coming my way.  Like. Ever!!  I have been impatient as Bern pointed out to me and have really resisted by forcing outcomes instead of trusting the process.  This will be a 'work on' for me....for some time.  It's all good.  Where do I have to be anyway??.....

Bless x